Maidenless Behavior
Not to play the white knight, but I don’t understand abusive men. I can’t comprehend being so upset that I would act out against people I love. When children do that, we get them help, look at them sideways, whisper, He needs to see someone. That’s not right. But a grown man gets a slap on the wrist, maybe a police report and a recommendation for anger management?
I awoke to some drama. My wife has a best friend who lives in a city four hours away. They grew up together, both children of college students who fled the Iranian Revolution. They’re constantly texting each other.
Around 2:30 AM, she gets a message: He’s losing it again. He thinks I cheated on him because of an old FB message. It was nothing, but now he’s screaming and going through all my stuff.
The morning goes on with sporadic messages, recordings of him screaming while their kids cry in the background, and pictures of new bruises.
This isn’t the first time. Police have been called before. Why doesn’t she take the kids and go? We should all know better than to ask this question. It’s always more complex than that. The psychology of the abused and myriad other variables make simple solutions elusive.
I don’t like feeling powerless. We know from experience that calling the police from here is pointless. They’ll send out a welfare check in about eight hours and walk away if no one answers the door.
I feel bad for her kids more than anything. Years of witnessing their father's violence have undoubtedly done deep and lasting damage.
The longer I live, the more I understand why women choose the bear.